Saturday, April 30, 2005

chiang mai

I'm leaving in less than 24 hours time and the reality of it still hasn't hit me. I'm like, whatever. I'm worried that I'm not worried. We're going to be helping a local school organise a children's programme over their holidays. I am frikkin bad with children. Actually I think I'm a little afraid of them. I mean, 200 7 and 8 year olds happily running amok around my knees yammering on in Bahasa Thai or whatever is not my idea of being in control. I'm think I'm worried about a lot of things I shouldn't be worried about. And not bothering with stuff I should be bothering about. Like packing and checking my bag instead of blogging.
Well at least I got a good sending off meal. 1x black pepper crab cooked my mom's way. Ooooh. Heaven. And a bowl of ice cream later. Ah.

I'm not feeling so good.

Friday, April 29, 2005

say hello to my little friend Posted by Hello

scream baby scream Posted by Hello

eat your heart out carlos santana Posted by Hello

base jump

If you ever feel like committing suicide and decide to do it by jumping off a building and then lose your nerve once you actually get to the 14th storey of the block opposite your house, then solve your problem by going to the roof terrace of the esplanade. At night. Chances are you'll be more than inspired to do what you went there to do. When you look out from the ledge at night, hands on the low wall, feeling the fresh night breeze and taking in the seeming peace and beauty of the scene, you just want to climb up and just let yourself go. Fly away from here. Close your eyes and be one your surroundings. The air, the silence, the darkness, the letting go.


Thursday, April 28, 2005


Thailand's coming. I'm leaving this sunday and I barely feel any anticipation or anything at all. The best I could describe is probably just casual indifference. I'm just regarding the mission trip as something I've got to go and do. Rather than something I'm looking forward to. I don't know. I just don't. I'm praying so had that somehow I won't end up a liability there, working and living with the villagers.
Right now life seems to be slowing to a standstill. Other than work, I really don't have anything much else to do. It seems everyone is off doing something else and is too busy. Either that or they're sitting at home under self imposed house arrest and staring at a glowing screen all day. Yes thats you Shaun. Dammit Gabriel, I'm frikkin jealous you hear. Only a pair of stand up speak up bands will help balance the scales again.You too Jon.

I'm blabbering

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

sorry seems to be the hardest word

So the Japanese finally said sorry for the shit they did during World War 2. An apology 60 years in the making. 60 years of hiding, denial and disbelief finally shown for the sham its always been.
I happened to read the Rape of Nanking a couple of months back and honestly, anybody who's hopelessly in love with the Japanese culture, maniacally bopping away to their music without ever understanding any of the lyrics, blowing oodles of money on jap hairstyles and jap fashion trends, ought to spend some time with this book.
This is what the Japs were like a mere 60 years ago. Rifle bearing teenagers going around savagely raping women, ramming objects into their mouths and vaginas, forcing sons to rape their mothers and fathers to rape their daughters and then shooting them all after. Forcing people to commit necrophilia, bestiality and other sexual horrors. Officers holding competitions where they raced to see who could behead more Chinese within a certain time frame. Approximately 260,000 people were killed in Nanking alone. Thats pushing the combined death toll from every country affected by the monster tsunamis last year. At the time of the Japanese overthrow of Nanking, there were about 600,000 people living in the city. So essentially almost half of all the people were victims, whether direct or indirect, of the Japanese.
For us Singaporeans we don't even need to look very far. How many thousands of Signaporeans were mowed down on the beaches of Changi. Beautiful as Changi Beach Park might be now, it was a living nightmare a mere 60 years ago. And the only way out was to end the part about living.
This is just what people have conveniently put aside in their heads. I'm no fan of China, but I can't say I blame them for protesting against Japan and its quiet aloofness.

'Well thanks for the history lesson, but aren't you overdoing this a little? That was a long time ago. The Japs are different now. Look at them, they're so polite and efficient and all. Give them a break.'

Maybe. But honestly, the sheer brutality and grotesqueness of Japanese movies and manga speak for themselves. Don't me wrong. I enjoy the movies too. Some of them at least. But they do speak volumes of the writer's mentality. Need I mention the growing number of violent outbursts in Japan. Everyone remembers the 17 year old kid who hijacked a bus and had to have a CT squad storm in after him. Battle frikkin Royale.

The events of the Last Samurai happened somewhere in the 1890s. So that means, 40 years after Tom Cruise proclaimed them honorable, hardworking and dedicated people, they got a little sick of being called that and when all out to disclaim it.

This is long.

as if flab wasn't a big enough worry Posted by Hello

kona sai Posted by Hello

no he's not moving fast. my hands can't stop trembling Posted by Hello

road hogging just gained a whole new dimension Posted by Hello

even the bikes were feeling it Posted by Hello

Monday, April 25, 2005

everyday i wake up and its monday

The goddamned router is on the blink. Less than two months after putting it to use it fails me. Now gotta use the bloody dial up connection again, which I can't use almost every night because either my sister or my dad will want to use it and they've always got all sorts of reasons.


Went hitting the trail again on Saturday. Problem was, I'd only slept 3 hours after reaching home at 0600 in the morning. Dammit. Coach Carter is a great show. But it kinda loses a little bit of shine when you watch it at 0235 in the morning after work. And then pay a 30 dollar cab fare to go home. Don't ask.
So anyway, there I was happily bouncing up and down the trail and getting extremely shack, but no accidents. Didn't fall down. Rocks, roots, branches, fucking scary downhills and I didn't fall down. Five metres away from my gate on a perfectly fla opent concrete pavement however, and I do. Spectacularly too. Home free and speeding, I stood up on my bike and took a hand off the bar to push my helmet back.
Somewhere between my lifting off my hand and my hand flailing madly and helplessly in the air, the thought 'wait a minute, you don't know how to do that!' came into my head. Immediately after which I found myself being catapulted forward for a meeting with the ground. Ouch.
Which is more painful? A scratched and bruised body? Or ego?

Thursday, April 21, 2005


Ugh. Dota from 1200 to 0600. That frikkin insane la. I'm still feeling half dead even though I've slept more than half the day away. How to go work like this?

Die la.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

hey at least i remembered to put my shirt on Posted by Hello


Woke up early for a run today. Good stuff. Amazing how alive I feel whenever I get my heart pounding. The sweat pours out and you just feel as if you're letting everything out.
Why bother to waste money drinking or smoking or what not. Running is free.

The funny thing is. During work later I'll feel frikkin drained.

go forth and moo-tiply! Posted by Hello

Monday, April 18, 2005

how the mighty have fallen Posted by Hello

ccb Posted by Hello

road rage

Haha get this. Some guy keeps happily parking his lau pok chia in the resident's carpark in my estate without a proper parking pass. I think he must've been doing this for quite a while cuz my parents seem to know exactly which car it was. Not sure whether he stays here.
But it seems he finally tested somebody's patience too far. And ended up with 1x 'get the hell outta here' note.
And the best part? When the rest of the residents found out about it, they demended that the note be reproduced for everyone to see! So here it is in all its glory on the notice board at my life lobby. Condo it!

Sunday, April 17, 2005

i can't help myself

Ugh, getting home at 0330 and then gettin up at 0800 for church on sunday is not a hobby I'm very keen on taking up. Work yesterday was a mess. Everything was so jumbled up. Cashier kept putting wrong tables numbers. The tables were all over the place. I lost count of the number of occassions I was wandering around trying to find a table with a plate of rapidly melting ice cream in my hands. And some bloody gay piece of shit asked for my number. This is shit. This is fucked shit.

There're two hot girls in bikinis happily sunbathing at the pool just outside my window, seven stories down. I need a pair of binoculars.

Saturday, April 16, 2005

1x gay pic Posted by Hello

the view when you gone case hong gan liao Posted by Hello

the view when you're frikkin shack Posted by Hello

the view when you're having fun Posted by Hello

but no worry. lets do this Posted by Hello

well somebody doesn't like me thats for sure Posted by Hello

all set Posted by Hello

i, i feel so alive!

Its amazing what a round of excercise can do for you. Woo hoo! 2 laps of Bukit Timah trail. At speed. Cuz some frikkin ang mohs were hot on our tail. Cannot lose face to ang moh. Asian pride. Today marks the day I can cycle with no hands on the bar. Muahahah! Soon I'll be able to sms and cycle at same time. Power eh? SAF should have bicycle troops. With te neh neh weapon studded bicycles. Sure beats walkin anyway.

Work later.

don't let the sun go down on me. Posted by Hello

bitch Posted by Hello

need help

God I'm tired. Just pulled a monster shift yesterday. 14 hours straight on the job.
So I earn a lot yesterday. But at what bloody cost. I"m frikkin exhausted right now. And looking at the days ahead the future doesn't look too bright. Gotta meet my cousin Justin later to go hump Bukit Timah hill. Then there's cell and then gotta rush down for work till 0200. Have to wake up early for church on Sunday and then play soccer for the church team at1530 all the frikkin way at Bedok and then rush down once again for work. To make it worse, both JH and Jeraldine, this girl from work whom we sort of hang with, aren't gonna be working with me. So I'm going to be all alone.

Anyone want to volunteer to be my chauffeur for a day?

See la, I can't even remember how to spell chauffeur. Had to use Microsoft Word spell check. Hong Gan liao.

Friday, April 15, 2005

hiroshima never really looked the same again Posted by Hello
my room looks damn jia lat

Thursday, April 14, 2005

its time for a stint in the freezer Posted by Hello

tortally Posted by Hello

don't worry i washed my hands Posted by Hello